I wasn't feeling well yesterday and what, with the bloodshot eyes and all, I wanted to be in the dark as much as possible. So, I decided to ride the 'quiet car' on the train ride home.

The lights are dimmed in the quiet car and there are special rules. I practically have the rules memorized because they are stated after every stop and on every car (whether you're on the quiet car or not).

"No cell phones, pagers or conversations allowed in the quiet car", is the basic message.

I've never ridden in the quiet car because I've heard that there are Quiet Car Nazi's on board. These are people who take these rules a bit too seriously. Yesterday, I witnessed it for myself.

The train sits at the boarding station for about 15-20 minutes, from the time it arrives until the time it departs. I missed the previous train by about 5 minutes, so I got to sit in the quiet car for the full 20. While sitting there, I heard a rather loud cellphone talker OUTSIDE of the train. She was in the train station, not in the quiet car; being my point. But the doors were open on the train and you could hear her. Big deal. You could also hear the hustle and bustle of all of the folks running toward their train, announcements for other trains, etc.

It WAS a big deal according to today's Quiet Car Nazi (QCN). After about three minutes, this QCN got up from her seat and walked to the door and stared down the cell phone talker. Apparently, the cell phone talker wasn't intimidated by this because she kept on yacking. Back to the seat storms the QCN, who then picked up her newspaper and continually ruffled it in an angry manner. Of course the cell phone talker couldn't see this, so I guess this was her warning to the rest of us in the car that we'd better behave.

About 5 minutes before departure, a gal sat in the seat beside me. Her cell phone rang (horrors!), so she answered and talked quietly to her husband about how she was on her way home. As soon as that phone rang, the QCN turned completely around in her seat and stared down the gal sitting next to me. She was COMPLETELY turned around in her seat! AND, as the train announcer was announcing the departure and the quiet car rules, she pointed up to the overhead speaker, while staring down the cellphone talker.

I was about to burst out laughing at the absurd scene she was making, but being the rule-follower that I am- I kept my yapper shut. The gal next to me was practically whispering and you could tell that she was just going to give information and then get off the phone. What's the big deal, especially when she was doing it while the train announcements were going on. It was ALREADY noisy!

This time she did intimidate the cell phone talker, because the gal got up and walked off to another car of the train. The QCN was clearly pleased at her powers and then turned back around in her seat.

I kid you not- someone started coughing at one point and they got the stink-eye from QCN.

People like this drive me batty. I cannot imagine what it would be like to live or work with this woman, however I think it would be fun to watch her antics again. I might just have to ride the quiet car again.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, public transportation provides me endless hours of entertainment. And it's free! (well, sort of....)