Thursday, May 12, 2005

Is there a Hallmark card for this?
I kept looking at my calendar to see if it was "everyone get stupid and call RisibleGirl to solve your problems" day. But I didn't see it on my calendar but was pretty sure it was on everyone else's calendar.

It was one stupid thing after another today. At first? Laughable. Mid morning? Annoying. Afternoon? Beyond irritating.

The final straw was the following conversation between me and one of the most annoying people I've ever had the chance to meet. Seriously this woman is almost a cartoon. She talks in a falsetto voice and is on personal calls ALL.DAY.LONG. Generally the calls are to some government entity or another.

Her: Hello? Yes, I want to file a complaint because my garbage man didn't put the lid squarely on my garbage can.

Her: Hello? Yes, there is a crack in the sidewalk out in front of my house and nobody has fixed it yet.

Her: Hello? I have a virus on my computer. Can you tell me what it is? No, my computer is at home and I'm at work. I just want to know what the virus is."

Her: Hello? I got a scratch on my arm from the file cabinet. I want to file Workmans Comp.

There are several more, but I think you get the drift.

Today, I was busy and feeling more than a little pressured due to my heavy workload. I heard a squeak in front of my cubicle and look up to find 'annoying co-worker' leaning over my cube wall. Here is the conversation almost verbatim. I swear I am NOT making any of this up.

Her: Do you know how to keep pop cans from exploding?
Me: Huh?
Her: There is a pop can in the sink and it looks like it's going to explode. Do you know how to fix it?
Me: Uh, no.
Her: Really?
Me: (remember, I was already annoyed from several incidents of stupidity today) Now why do you think I'd know how to fix a can that is going to explode?
Her: Oh. OK. Well, will you go in the kitchen and fix it?
Me: (giving her the most 'I can't believe I'm even having this conversation with you' look) Really, why are you asking me to do this?
Her: So, you won't go fix it then?
Me: No.
Then she stares at me like she's hoping I'll change my mind. Eventually she shrugs her shoulders and walks over to the co-worker across the aisle from me and starts the conversation the exact same way.

The other co-worker made me laugh because she asked, "why is this YOUR problem? Is this your can?" Then after the annoying co-worker said, "no, it's not my can but I'm worried that someone will touch it", the funny co-worker said, "well then, they're stupid."

Eventually, the annoying co-worker got someone to throw the can away for her. Get that? They THREW THE CAN AWAY FOR HER.

Normally I think of her as my comedy break for the day. Today? Not so much.

RisibleGirl was blabbing on about her adventures again on 05/12 at 05:44 PM

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