I have so many letters to write, so thought I'd just do it in one fell swoop.

Dear friends and family,
I'm sorry I've been incommunicado, but I've been busy trying to save my bacon job. Really, one day this will all be behind me (according to Eckhart Tolle who has been a wonderful read before work in the morning.) I can't promise I'll be in touch soon, because I'm horrible about that sort of thing anyway.

Dear favorite blogs,
Read above

Dear guy on the elevator at the bus station this morning,
You've made me even more certain that I need to buy and wear a spy camera so I can take pictures without being noticed. You know those people that I've already written to (see above)? They'll thank me for it.

Dear guy on my floor that thinks he's really important,
Really? Really? Do you have to wear a wireless headset and pace back and forth talking loudly on the phone? Come on- from what I've heard, you're really not THAT important.

Dear temporary project manager that I've written about before,
I swear to all that's holy, if you join in on ONE MORE conversation in which you weren't invited, then well, I can't be responsible for my actions. I have a head injury you know... I can't be held responsible for anything anymore. Seriously, I'm tired of the "prairie dogging" that you do every time someone comes over to my desk to talk to me. You make their visits exponentially less enjoyable. I've heard you tell people that you keep a bowl of candy at your desk so people will come visit. I'm not sure I'd admit that, really.

Dear lady with four toes on the train today,
Wow, I have to give you a high five for having the great self esteem to wear open toed sandals. I'm sorry that I kept looking at your feet, but I was seriously counting over and over again to be sure I didn't miss one. Good for you!

Dear 'Large Marge' that sometimes rides my bus when I'm going to the train station,
Hey, I used to be a Large Marge too, but I never sat my butt on top of someone and then tried to wriggle it in a space that was clearly to small for me. You made me a wee bit uncomfortable. Only my husband is allowed on top of me, if you get my drift.

Dear BJ,
I'm so glad you finally got a camera phone, and even happier that you shared the pictures from your hotel with me. Really, this one had me HOWLING with laughter. Your company really knows how to put you up in a nice hotel, don't they?


And then, your email today describing the rest of the accommodations? Well, I'm sorta sorry for laughing at your situation, but I really did need a good laugh.

There is also the obligatory duct tape around the railing on the stairs up to the room. Plus, in the front lobby the really cool tile they picked out is now shattering when people step on it because they didn’t get the floor underneath smooth before they laid it.

Well, I think that about covers it.

Love (or not, depending on who you are),
Lori aka RG