I've always heard that snakes don't have lips, but that was proved wrong yesterday because I got PLENTY of lip service from the snake I wrote about a couple of days ago.

Although I had planned to handle this myself, Iki from the After Hours Pub gave me lots of compelling reasons why I shouldn't (thanks for taking the time to write me that long email Iki!) I took her advice to heart and made an appointment with my manager for first thing yesterday morning. That meeting went well and I felt very supported. He cautioned me to be sure to take the high road on this and don't get into the "reply all" pissing match. I assured him that pissing matches weren't my style because I'm too old to play those games. I just want to do my job and make my customers happy. I refuse to get in pissing matches with some dork.

And a dork he is. The meeting was at 11 a.m. At 11:15, I sent him an email from my cell phone asking him if he planned to show up. He replied that he thought the meeting was at 11:30 "and where is it at again?" OK, there was no excuse for this, because I sent him a meeting request last week. An OUTLOOK meeting request with all of that information. He showed up at 11:20.

I created a one page talking points memo and gave him a copy. I wanted it documented what we talked about and no excuses for him forgetting. Here's a print screen of the memo. As you can see, there's lots of highlighting and red circles and red squares, which will be explained in a moment.


The memo starts out with explaining why the issues we're having are a problem, I mainly focused on customer dissatisfaction and customer distrust. The next section was examples of specific issues. I highlighted the offensive sentences and wrote WHY they were offensive in the text boxes bordered in red.

The last part of the memo was a list of my functions and a list of his functions.

I gave him the copy of the memo and explained that I wanted to have written talking points so I'd stay on track. I told him that I think he's a really fun and energetic person and I needed something to follow so I didn't get caught up in his energy. That's the honest truth. I left out the part where I just wanted documentation for future violations.

He was agreeing with everything I said, with a whole lot of energy and "yeah, I 'totally' should have done that" and lots of "kewl" and "SWEET!" thrown in. Side note: on close inspection (we were sitting close to a window), I'd say this guy is over 45... so those words need to be obliterated from his vocabulary.

I suspected that I was getting lip service because it was all too easy. He was WAY too agreeable. I knew I was getting lip service when we were done with the meeting and he asked me to show him what I'd done with the last web request he sent me. I didn't create it the way he ordered it; not because I was being stubborn, it was because he didn't know what he was doing AND the web folks refused to do it his way. He got hot under the collar and kept saying, "that's NOT how I wanted it". I started getting hot under the collar myself and kept reminding him that it doesn't matter what HE wanted. It only matters what the client wants and that I met with the client before I turned in the specs.

He then made such a fit about it and how the executives were expecting it his way that I said I would try to compromise, but reminded him that this is EXACTLY WHY HE NEEDS TO KEEP HIS HANDS OUT OF MY BUSINESS. (all in caps because, although it doesn't happen very often, I was steaming mad and wasn't even trying to hide it.) He told me that if it goes over deadline than that's fine. I mentioned that my name is attached to that deadline and I refuse to tarnish my perfect reputation (I seriously have never missed a deadline and I have several nights of working until 2 or 3 in the morning to prove it.) He tried to tell me that he'd make that part OK.

Sorry buddy, but I don't trust you.

By the end of the conversation, I couldn't even swallow. You know how you can get so angry and you need to swallow but you know if you do it'll look like this huge gulp of fear? I refused to let him even think I was afraid. So, instead I almost drowned on my own spit. Heh.

Later my manager asked how it went. I told him that I was too angry to talk about it and I was going to see where things go after this. He seemed to want to get involved, but respected my need to try to handle it. I really am going to see where this goes. I'm going to wipe the slate clean after this last web job is finished and hope that he's learned a lesson.

He's crossed that line that few people cross with me, so the next infraction will not be pleasant for him.