Tomorrow I face the hairdresser. It's not that I hate getting my hair cut. I'm dreading it because my hairdresser drives me completely insane. She has conspiracy theories

and she takes forever to tell me about them. I kid you not, my butt is in her chair for no less than three hours at a time. Listening to conspiracy theories in a whispered voice. Three hours. Yeah. Fun.

I'm sure you're wondering why I don't just change hairdressers. It's like this.... I'm vain about my hair and she does a good job. I've spent my entire adult life looking for someone who can deal with my hair and even better, my need for always wanting something slighty edgy. Well, I've found her. For that, I'm willing to give up 3 hours of my life - and sanity - every six weeks or so.

I've decided to make a game of it. I want to know what whacky theory you think she'll come up with next. There is no prize except the satisfaction that you've (imagine in a game show host voice) Named That Theory!

Three years ago, I suggested that our family draw names for Christmas presents since there aren't any kids and some of the members really couldn't afford to buy everyone presents.

Everyone thought it was a great idea; well, except for my mother. She complained about it and said that it took all the fun out of Christmas. Christmas morning after everyone opened their present, she said that she never wanted to do that again.

She was vetoed and we did it again last year. The people who didn't have a lot of money to spend really enjoyed the financial relief from not having to buy presents for the entire family. I enjoyed the gift of time that it gave me, as well as relief from shopping. I hate shopping, especially during the holidays.

This year hubby drew Mom's name. One of the things we've learned over the years is that when Mom gives you a Christmas or birthday list, you'd best not stray from it. If you do, you're going to hear mutterings and clucking. So, I asked Mom for her wish list. I got her reply this morning, saying that she found something she really likes in a little shop downtown and she'd like to buy it and then be reimbursed for it. Of course, she'll have it wrapped, she added.

Of course she will. I mean, isn't that what Christmas is all about? Making sure that the present you bought for yourself is wrapped? That, and surprises as in making sure that person giving the gift is completely surprised at what they've given.

I guess this means that Mom gets what she wants for Christmas. And that, my friends, will make everyone's Christmas a little bit more jolly.

I got a late night booty call from my son's roommate last night. There are two things wrong with this.

1. This call was at 1:59 a.m. Anything after 10pm is late night for me. I'm generally long gone into Slumberville by then.

2. Ummmm, here's the obvious what's wrong with this scenario statement. It was a booty call from my son's roommate.


Ok, really, this isn't as bad as it sounds. I've called my son a few times at his house, they have caller ID and my last name is different than my son. Of course my first name is a girl's name. Add all that up in a drunk young man's head and apparently you get "ohhhhh, a chick keeps calling, she must want me".

My son's roommate was very drunk. Incoherently so. I only understood bits and pieces of the phone message, but the point was that he wanted to know who the "chick" was that kept calling and who it was she wanted to talk to. Because if it was him then I should call him back right away so he could help me take care of business.

Ohh.... I can't wait to tell my son about this. He's gonna just die.

You are driven by a higher purpose than most people. You have a deeply-rooted desire to facilitate peacefulness in the world. Whether through subtle interactions with love ones, or through getting involved in social causes, it is important to you to influence the world. You are driven by a desire to encourage others to think about the positive side of things instead of focusing on the negative. The reason your unconscious is consumed by this might stem from an innate fear of war and turmoil. Thus, to avoid that uncomfortable place for you, your unconscious seeks out the peace in your environment. Usually, the thing that underlies this unconscious drive is a deep respect for humankind. You care about the future of the world, even beyond your own involvement in it. As a result, your personal integrity acts as a surrogate for your deeper drive toward peace and guides you in daily life towards decisions that are respectful toward yourself and others.

People who have unconscious minds driven by peace tend to be independent thinkers who often prefer to live by their own high personal standards and moral code. Though your unconscious mind is driven most strongly by Peace, there is much more to who you are at your core.

There....isn't....any.....cheese.....in......the.....house.

I'm feeling faint.