Family

I get called 'mom' a lot. Of course my boys call me 'mom', but so do a lot of other boys that I do not remember giving birth to. I know there are some pretty fabulous birthing drugs available, but I think at some point I'd remember at least changing a diaper or two.

The boys are all around the same age- early to mid 20's. Some of them are friends of my boys, but lots of them are just guys from work.

Maybe I'm not old enough to let this offend me, or perhaps I'm just not someone who has issues with wanting to hang on to my youth. I like it. I like it when one of my "boys" emails me after I've worked on their site and says, "Thanks Mom". Sometimes they just pop over to my building to come visit 'Mom'. I like having a lot of boys. Funny thing is, I've never had a girl call me 'mom'. I guess I've always been a "boy mom". Not sure if I'd of been a good "girl mom", but hoping to be a great "girl grandma".

::To my REAL boys- when you read this, I do not want to be a grandma anytime in the near future. Thank you. Love, Mom::

What's really fun is walking into a building and having guys representing various ethnic groups call me 'mom'. I like to think it makes people wonder. Especially if someone has seen several different guys greet me this way.

I think I'm 'Mom' to so many guys because I don't let them get away with stuff. When I chastize them, I tell them I'm only shaking my finger at them because I care about them and want them to be successful. I also listen to their dating woes and laugh at their 'boy' humor. One of my clients gets me with the same joke every time. When he calls me on the phone at work he recites his entire title. "This is [guys name], assistant vice president and manager of [guys department], reporting up through [guys division], at [name of our company]. He's done this, oh, a hundred times and I still laugh like an idiot. I really shouldn't egg my kids on like that.

Since Mother's Day is coming up, I'm thinking of cashing in on all this mother love. Maybe next time I get an email that reads, "thanks for taking care of me again Mom" from one of my clients, I'll write back, "You're welcome. Oh, and flowers are ALWAYS appropriate for Mother's Day. Love, Mom".

My dad had significant surgery on his spine just over a week ago. As you can imagine, he's been in a great deal of pain and has had to take the "good stuff" around the clock.

Last night I talked to my dad on the phone about real estate documents he was trying to understand. Since I have a limited practice law license, he thought I could help him out. I'm afraid that even Miss Maryann from Romper Room wouldn't have been able to help him understand the alphabet. Sorry Dad, but you're kind of funny when you're all drugged up.

It was kind of weird to talk to him on the phone in this condition. He was forgetful, spacey, and kind of talked in circles. But very affectionate and talkative. heh. I told my dad that if this is what he was going to be like when he's old, then I want NO part of it!

Dad sent the girls (me and sis) an update today. The first sentence, was:

"Feeling better today. And in spite of the drugs, I was able to get most of the answers on Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. I just amaze myself."

My dad... he's a funny one. Indeedee doo.

Yesterday on my way to visit Sis, the song 'Everybody Have Fun Tonight' by Wang Chung, came on the radio.

Sometimes when I'm home alone I like to do things to amuse myself. Occasionally if a 'danceable' song comes on the radio, I'll get up and dance. Trust me on this one folks, RisibleGirl will never make it as a professional dancer. I can put BJ in hysterics when something 'danceable' comes on the TV and I get up and shake my 'moneymaker' in front of him.

Sometimes when it's a little too quiet for me in the house I break into song, occasionally mixing it up by singing it like the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz. Mind you, it's not an ordinary song you'll find on the radio, rather, it'll be a song like "Shapoopy" from The Music Man. Then I laugh. By myself.

Hmmm... that sounds a little scary. I'm usually laughing about the fact that I 'm being so absurd... Oh, who am I kidding. I laugh because I crack.myself.up.

I also like to run and slide in my socks along the linoleum floor a la Tom Cruise in Risky Business.

I had one of these moments in the car yesterday when the Wang Chung song came on. I was singing along in all kinds of crazy voices (munchkins, rap, Jessica Simpson.. j/k) and I suddenly got a little self-conscious. I started imagining what the conversation would be between my dead relatives if they happened to be watching me at that moment......



Apparently I'm not alone in this sort of thing. My sister likes to do "The Robot" (a dance from the 80's) when nobody is looking. She's told me that she'll even do it in her car at red lights. I'll bet she's really glad that I'm sharing this information on my blog. heh.

Since it seems to run in the family, it kind of makes me wonder what strange things my relatives did to amuse themselves. Who knows, maybe they're still doing it.

So, what weird thing do YOU like to do to make yourself laugh?

I decided to make the trek to the East side today to go have some fun with my sis. While there, I usually call to see if one or both of my boys are available for lunch. They're all grown up now, but still appreciate it when Mom can provide a good meal for them. It used to be much easier when I lived in the same city. We (my sis and two boys) all lived within five minutes from each other and my house was the hub.

I liked to cook dinner for them whenever they'd let me, and generally one or another would stop by after work for a visit at least three or four times a week.

Now I live about 1.5 hours away, so it's not quite so easy to spend time with my family. I miss that, to be honest. I'm kind of a family gal and would much rather spend time with family than any of my friends. So, I was pretty excited about the prospect of getting to see my sister and hopefully my boys.

On the way down I called son number two, who told me that he was moving today. I told him that I'd be happy to bring him lunch so he could continue the chore of moving, but instead he said that he'd really like to have lunch with me and my sis. Awww, he really is a sweet boy.

We wanted to help him move, but he wouldn't hear of it. Instead, he said that after Sis and I had our fun, we should stop by and see his new bachelor pad.

On the way to his new digs, we stopped by a convenience store to pick up something to drink. We were stopped short in our tracks by this:



That's right... it was a bag of "bar-b-quin' with my honey" Rap snacks. I decided that "sweet boy" would indeed appreciate a bag of this delightful treat.

When we got to the honeycomb hideaway, Sis and I checked out every nook and cranny. I had to laugh at the contents of his fridge:



Pizza and beer.

When did this happen? When did my little koolaid and chocolate chip cookies boy turn into a man that keeps pizza and beer in his fridge?

Sigh.... I feel so old.

I have NO idea why I haven't blogged about this sooner. I kind of forgot about it, I guess. That is, until my sweet little boy reminded me of it tonight.

BJ and I got married in Vegas almost one year ago. We were fortunate enough to have lots of family and friends fly in and celebrate our wedding with us. After the wedding, we took everyone (about 30 people) out to a wonderful dinner that was quite away from the strip. The food was great, the wine was great, and everyone had a great time.

Afterward, the best man thought it would be a good idea to rent a van to take us all back to the strip thinking that it would be cheaper than several taxi's. We all piled in the van which had seating in a U shape.

It's important for the story that you know the seating arrangements. On one end of the U, there was a driver. The other side was a movie screen. I sat between my (new!) husband and my youngest son, and sitting directly across from me was my oldest son. The rest of the van was a bunch of BJ's friends. All guys.

The driver asked if we wanted a movie, and everyone yelled "yeah!" "bring it on!" etc.

The movie starts, and what do you know... it's PORN. On the big screen. I am not a watcher of porn, but have to admit that rather than be shocked or offended I was practically on the floor laughing. I was laughing at how my poor boys (and new husband!) were turning inside-out from embarrassment. In addition, the rest of the guys were whooping it up and pretending to spank the "actress". Everyone was looking and laughing, except my two boys and my husband. They were looking at the ceiling, at the floor, out the window, pretty much anywhere but where the action was.

Of course I couldn't let it go. I kept asking the boys if they needed me to explain anything and asking BJ if he was taking notes.

I think the phrase of the night was from my oldest son. "There's not enough alcohol in the world to make me forget this......."

That's right, honey. And in case you do forget, you can thank your brother that the story is now permanently in cyberspace for all the world to see.

Muah ha ha ha ha ha ha