Work Related

Life lesson #4,529: There is not enough Lori to go around, no matter how far Lori tries to stretch herself. I'm happy to report a very speedy lesson. Ummm.. well.... speedy in the grand scheme of things.

My business has been wildly successful; more successful than I'd even dreamed. That's saying a lot because I'm a big dreamer.

I've known early on that my business was successful due to the unique skill set I had to offer. I can say with full confidence that I'm the only person in the U.S. with my skill set, and I'm selling my skill set when I market to new clients so farming out the work is not an option. Cameron is coming along nicely in his training, but he's still 20 years behind me in experience so there's some catchin' up to do. I have complete faith that he'll be able to do anything that I can do eventually, but for now- the bulk relies square on my shoulders.

I was asked by "Big Fish" to up my hours from 30/week (starting January) to 40/week (starting March). I've been at 20/week since 2009. I thought that would be an awesome way to speed up to retirement. What I found was that it was a quick way to make lots of money, but in the end took a toll on my liver condition and took me away from my original goal to build my business to have a variety of customers. I was unable to offer the same customer service that my other customers were used to and so I've asked Big Fish to cut back my hours to 24. That's not as drastic as it may appear. At 24 hours I'm still making WAY more than I was making as a full time employee at my previous employer, PLUS I have other clients. Oh, and my sanity. heh.

Here's a tip from yours truly: Money isn't EVERYTHING. Money does NOT buy happiness. I already knew that, but I thought that I was responsible to make as much money as was being sent my way. I'd made my intention known that I wanted a successful business, therefore I felt that turning business away was irresponsible. What I found was that I was not taking care of myself. It was a very quick and painful lesson. One that I'm going to pay attention to.

It was a bit of a rocky road to climb out of the hole I'd made for myself, but I'm getting there.

I've learned that my neurologist was right that since the head injury my brain does NOT work right when I'm under too much stress. I forget things and become very confused. I can't even write well enough for spell-check to figure out what word I'm trying to use. Even worse, I'd become so wrapped up in working that I forgot to order my head meds (from the brain injury in 2007) refill from the mail order pharmacy and had to go cold turkey for six days. Each day became exponentially worse than the previous with the bottom completely falling out over the weekend. It was quite ugly. I called my doctor on Monday and she said that this was extremely dangerous and I should have called for a temporary refill on the drugs until the mail order drugs came in. So, I got that last night and feel much better today. Still feel like my brain is bouncing around the inside of my skull, but at least I don't hear funny sounds when I move my eyes. (weird, right?)

Underlying all of this is the frustration with my inability to walk. All of this began two years ago in May. Can you believe it? Tomorrow I go get a shot in my tendon (does NOT sound at all fun.) Not sure what the shot is, but the surgeon said it's not cortisone. She said it was an anesthetic of some kind. I'm also getting a new MRI on my ankle to see what's going on. It's official that I can no longer walk more than 10 minutes without pain shooting up to a 7 or 8. The pain level doesn't go back down for a couple of days, so I'm doing a lot of sitting on my arse. You can imagine what that does to the waist line. It's not necessarily weight-bearing that's causing the pain (though I'm sure it exacerbates the issue), it's just the movement of the ankle. Even driving a car hurts because I have to move my ankle to work the gas pedal.

My follow-up appointment with the surgeon is on Monday. I'm ready to have my ankle fused back together at this point. Or just cut the damned thing off (I kid... sort of....) I can't even begin to express the frustration this has caused me. I'm basically house-bound because walking anywhere for any length of time hurts even if I'm wearing my boot. I can't go do anything fun, not even grocery shopping. Sure, I could ride around in one of those carts, but I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo done with this. As the weather becomes nicer, I become more crabby about it.

So, I guess we can all agree that it's been a very rough couple of weeks and all of it was self-induced. My brother told me this weekend (thanks for talking me down, bro!) that I really need to stop feeling responsible for everything and everyone around me and he's right. I think it's left-overs from being a single parent. It's a real mind-trip when you're responsible for EVERYTHING (keeping a household, making enough money to support my children, paying the bills, etc. etc. etc. ) for two children for most of their lives (TOTALLY WORTH IT!) It's hard to let go of that mind-set. The boys are able to support themselves and BJ has been able to manage living for 42 years without my assistance. Nobody is going to die if I'm unable to be the end-all and be-all for everyone and everything in my life (well, except Einstein, of course. giggle)

Yup, I know that there are awful things going on around me (Japan! Cancer! Death!) and so I feel guilty for whining about this. I think that it's the layer upon layer of stuff that has happened since 2007 that often-times feels like a never-ending mountain I've had to climb. Every time something else happens I think, "seriously? aren't we done?" And then I start climbing the mountain again and will continue to do so- perhaps not with a smile on my face but I'll climb dagnabbit.

The first step is to understand which path is worth climbing and that's what I'm working on now. I'll let you know how that turns out.

Poor little blog, you must feel ignored!

So many things to blog about, so little time so guess what? I'm going to write a This and That!

• My dad chose the next Soul Pancake assignment. The assignment was, "List 5 questions you hate not having the answer to." My answer:
  
  1. What will be the cause of my death?
  
  
  2. Am I done living all my lives (Is class over?)
  
  
  3. Will my family ever truly accept the spiritual path I’ve taken?
  
  
  4. Will I be guaranteed to never be destitute?
  
  
  5. Will there be a cure for Alzheimer’s before I get it? (this is my greatest fear)



• Big Fish extended my contract for the whole year and added more hours (kaCHING). There's only one of me, so Ranger Mike will be working with me at TLS (my company) along with Cameron (son #1). My plan is to do work exclusively for Big Fish and oversee Cameron and Ranger Mike (finally, payback for when he used to try to punch me in the head when we were kids!) on the rest of the clients. I keep saying I hope I don't get any bigger, but that doesn't seem to be working. I guess I need to just live with the idea that TLS is too good to be small.



• Physical therapy is going well on the fankle. It was a piece of cake in the beginning, but now it's getting serious. I am doing weight bearing exercises for 1.5 hours along with electrical stimulation therapy and ultrasound therapy. I'm getting quite a work out three times a week and won't be done (according to my PT) until at least the end of March. I also have 3x a day fankle exercises to do at home. I have an assigned PT to catch me if I start to pass out now. Can you guess why? Yeah- I started passing out a few of times and made them nervous. My answer to that was to not make me work so hard. They didn't like that answer very much.
  
  I really like the 'kids' there. They're all in their 20's and really nice kids. We joke around with each other and I've shared with them that I'd like them all to dance the "Thriller" dance for my graduation. Everyone else gets a shirt. Dontcha worry, I'll bring my video camera if they come through for me. ::snicker::
  
  I've noticed something really funny. My ankle now feels "floppy" to me. When I told my PT about it she said, "That's how NORMAL ankles work". Now I know for sure that my left fankle also has a coalition because it isn't 'floppy'. Having an extra bone in the ankle is great when you're wearing heels because your ankle doesn't wobble about. Now I wonder if I'll be able to wear heels ever again. For the record, I do not plan to have surgery on my left fankle. I'll just leave it locked up. At least this explains why I ran 'funny'.



• BJ and I have a REALLY fun weekend planned. Can't say much about it until afterward, but suffice it to say I'm really looking forward to it. Sadly, we can't take Einstein. I'm not too upset for him because he's practically a mascot at the puppy hotel. They love him there. He loves it there too. How do I know this? He allows the girls that work there to carry him around like a little baby. He won't let BJ or me carry him around. Little brat! He's just so darned cute (and smart.)

I'm totally hopped up about my company! I've grown so much that I actually need an employee! Woot! I'm hoping that this is the extent of employees for me, because I don't want to spend a lot of time on managing people.

Oh, did I mention that my employee is Cameron? He's PERFECT for this job. I knew he would be, because he thinks a lot like I do. We also work well together because he speaks up when he needs to. We've had training sessions prior to my hiring him and I was really impressed with the ideas he had and how he'd speak right up when he thought there was a better way to do something the client suggested. I *love* that, because it shows me that he's thinking outside the box instead of being a yes man. He's also very creative (like yours truly) and so it's almost like having a little clone. Who wouldn't want to have their own clone?

As soon as we finish our first project of the year, we're going to start creating off the shelf training for companies that have requested it. The cool thing about that is that we can resell the product to other companies, making it pure profit. Our first request is for a Bank Secrecy Act eLearning piece and then we're going to create a module for small medical offices that includes HIPAA and information security combined. My foot surgeon said she'd be my guinea pig.

We're also going to start teaching a course to K-12 that has been designed by The National Cyber Security Alliance and the Department of Homeland Security. I interviewed with them in December and am ready now to rock and roll. I think this will bring in more business, because I'll be giving away marketing stuff to take home. Though I'm always thinking about marketing, I've yet to market myself. All of my business has come through word of mouth or repeat business. I'm truly thankful to "Lori the Employee" for making such a good impression at her job back when she worked for 'da man, otherwise I wouldn't be so successful today. I'm also EXTREMELY grateful for those previous employers and peers that have believed in me so much that they gave me business at their new jobs. It's important to me that I do a good job so THEY look good. So far, so good.

2011 is going to be a great year. I don't know how I'll top 2010, but I know I will. I can feel it.

I've been traveling so much for either work or personal business that I'm getting close to MVP status. I can't wait until I get to stand in that 'other line'

I just returned from San Jose for a brief trip to visit one of my clients. I'll be going to Utah next month to visit a call center and then back in San Jose in November. I'll be going to Portland sometime between now and mid-September for a project from another client that I'm starting next week.

Last week, I finished a French version of one of my modules (oooh- la la!), so now I can say I'm international!

Additionally, I learned this week that one of my vendors sold two of my 'off the shelf' training modules, with another one pending. He's giving a seminar next week to discuss how important front-line training is and he's featuring my product and is asking for another line of product from me. I'm on it, dude! Another Information Security company found my company information on a forum I joined a couple of weeks ago and is asking about selling my product as well.

This self-employed stuff sure was a good idea!

I've learned recently that I might have an opportunity for another contract with a company out of San Francisco. That means another opportunity to work at home in my monkey slippers and visit cool places. What the WHAT? It wasn't even two years ago when I was worried about getting another job after being laid off.

I think the most rewarding part is that I truly feel appreciated by my customers. One of them said, "you're the best. I bet you get tired of hearing that", to which I replied, "I do get tired of hearing that, which is why I now require being told in different languages." Another one of my clients heard that story so she wrote to me today, "Thanks Lori!! you're the best! Since you need to hear it in a different language (aap bohat aache ho - in Hindi)"

I think I like the idea of requiring compliments in different languages. I might make it part of my Statement of Work (the contract between me and the folks hiring my services.)

On the downside, I had to purchase a new training program for just over $1,000.00- but it's something I've needed to take my training to the next level. Now I have it and I'll get to use it on the Portland customer, which will be fun.

Oh, did I mention that the National Association of Professional Women has named me Business Woman of the Year for the state of Washington? Yep. If you want to see, go to their site and put *my name in the search box. Once it pulls up my picture, click on it and you'll see the little ribbon showing my award. I get a plaque for my wall, even!

I guess this post is just a bunch of sentences reiterating how glad I am that I was brave enough to start my own company. I'm also thankful for the people (and you know who you are) who nudged me in that direction.

*if you don't know my full name, you'll just have to imagine it!

I'm currently contracted to two large international companies. I found out today that the Chief of Staff (CoS) of company one is leaving the company to work for another company and found out yesterday that the department head of company two has just left her employment there.

Does that scare me? Not in the least. CoS called me to tell me in person about her move and said that she wants to work with me at her new company, sharing with me that having me at 20 hours per week produces "way" more work than a full time employee. She knows that I want to stay at 20 hours with company one, but that doesn't keep me from accepting an additional contract with another company.

I've already turned in a very well received training piece to company two and they like it so much that they are planning to give me more contracts. I have no doubt that the newly departed department head at company two will be reaching out to me at her new company as well.

It's been an awesome leg up for me to have my original contacts at WaMu go to new companies and give me the handshake to the folks who would be able to give me work. I feel good that I've represented them well and have taken the ball and run with it. Now I'm getting second generation contacts who are taking me with them to new places and introducing me to new people.

I used to beat myself up for working so hard, at the detriment of having a personal life. Not anymore. Now I can see it was all worth it because I'm doing what I love to do and am working WAY less hours. The hours I work are at home in my sock monkey slippers next to a snoring dog.

Karma; it's a wonderful thing.