Things that bug me

I actually called in sick today. Yep. I know, it's hard to believe, especially since my course goes live TODAY. I have to admit that I'm checking my work email every 10 minutes once in a while. I've even made a doctor appointment for this afternoon without being pushed into doing it by everyone and their mother.

I think I might have pneumonia. I've had it enough in my life that I know the signs. Besides, a doctor appointment will ensure that I get the elixir from heaven- otherwise known as cough medicine with codeine. I'd better get a gallon of the stuff- - I'll be needing it. I think that one of the downsides of being a zombie at night due to the seroquel is that I'm not coughing at night- so everything is settling nicely in my lungs. That's my theory and I'm sticking to it. Unfortunately, this means that I'm coughing so much when I'm awake that it makes me throw up. (I don't know a nice, lady-like way to say that).

I feel like such a sickly old lady fragile lil' lamb lately. I don't think I've gone more than 2 weeks without something happening to me. This makes me wonder if there is something in my sub-conscious making this happen. I'm a firm believer in that, you know. I really need to get to the bottom of that because I am starting to get really annoyed by this.

Anyhoo- my appt is at 2:30 PST. I'll let you know what the doc says.

I'm still in that 'happy' zone, but...

OK- this part is happy, I went to dinner with my gorgeous lil' friend Angela last night. We both work downtown, so I drove to work, we had dinner downtown, and got home not a whole lot later than we would have if we'd have taken the train. Dinner was fab, but the company was even better. When her parents are ready to give her up for adoption, I'm taking her. I have acquired lots of kids that way, you know. OK- maybe not- but a girl can dream.

Angela, I have a sad tale to tell you. As we were driving home, I started getting a sore throat. This morning, I feel like there are knives in my throat- and you were sitting in an enclosed environment (my car) for an hour. I'm fairly certain this sore throat is a result of visiting that virus infested Urgent Care clinic on Tuesday. So, honey, please start taking airborne and whatever else you can scrounge up STAT. I'd feel horrible if you got sick just because I wanted to spend time with you!

Lessee- what else can I complain about (even though I'm terribly happy!). Oh yes, that project where I got all those glowing awards? Well, it turned sideways yesterday at about 3:30 pm. Mind you, it's supposed to go live on Monday. I was told that the training materials were too long. OK, I said, tell me at what point was it that y'all decided the 'appropriate' number of slides? Because, you see- y'all have seen this stuff for two weeks now and I've not heard a peep about length of training being an issue.

One of the helpful peeps decided to consolidate some of my slides-- in effect, making it so the same amount of information was in the training piece (e.g. readers were reading the same number of words), only now it was crammed onto less slides. They took out some of my graphics, and made the slides crowded and UGLY. Yeah, that makes a heckuva lot of sense.

I finally got him to tell me that 30 minutes was the max. I told him that's how long my course took if people read every word. If they just clicked from slide to slide, they could actually do it in 12 minutes. (believe me, I've tested it enough to know!). He said that when people see 70 slides, they'll freak out- so I need to cut the number of slides to 50- even though the course takes 30 minutes or less. Then he used that line "perception is reality".

I worked last night to get the course cut down to 52 pages (and not happy about it) and it's back out to the technologists, 5 hours ahead of when I told them I'd have it ready.

It darn well better be out to all 52000 employees Monday morning or I'm going to be VERRRRRRRRRRY vocal about it.

Watch out world, assertive Lori is back and is not to be messed with.

Especially when she has knives in her throat.

My manager told me that she wanted me to take the rest of the day off because of my heroic efforts. I wish I could, but I'm not signing off until everyone tells me that this project is put to bed. Doesn't mean I won't slack a little while I'm waiting for the news. I've already put in well over 8 hours between last night and this morning.

I have a secret. I watch Dr. G, medical examiner. It's fascinating, and doesn't gross me out in the least. Of course, I have to watch it when BER isn't around, because he couldn't be more grossed out by that sort of thing. Since he's on a business trip, I'm catching up on my Tivo's programs.

Right now, I'm watching a case where someone died of liver failure and had herpes simplex 1 (cold sores) all over her body at the time of death. Can you see why I find this rather creepy?

Nah- I'm really not worried about it. It was just weird timing to watch this, as I'm living it.

Well, except the death part.

I have lots of friends (men and women) that like to kiss me when they see me. My kissing friends are of the lip kissing variety.

Because of the solar system and planet issue (cold sores), I've taken to pointing out my flaws and announcing "Danger Zone" as they swoop in for the kiss. I probably don't even need to point it out because if you're within 10 feet of me, you can see that clearly I have a new life form growing on my face. In fact, they're making babies as I write this! A new one cropped up yesterday.

Thanks for the remedies, everyone. And Sam, you do win the prize for comment of the month! As soon as the little fellas grow fingers, I will tell them to get to work. I shudder to think what they'd blog about.

I've been taking Valtrex for years for this problem. I get them in my ears and nose and I've even had a weird strain (according to my doctor) crop up on my arm once during a liver flare-up. I also use Abbreva and L-Lysine. I'm certain that all of it shortens the life expectancy and I'd hate to think what it would be like if I didn't have these solutions, because the Valtrex should keep me from getting cold sores- but it doesn't. Hence the babies cropping up this weekend.

I'm just a walking bag of fun these days, aren't I? I've said it before and I'll say it again. At least I have a sense of humor.

If I had a dollar for every time I heard a gastro say that they wanted to 'get to the bottom of this', I'd be able to retire.

OK, that's an exaggeration. Sorry.

As y'all know, my gastro sent me to the ER last Friday so I'd have quick access to labs and imaging. Oh- and to meet my new drug pusher friend, Dr. Waffle.

The gastro's nurse just called me and said that the doc wants to see me to 'get to the bottom of this'. I told her that I've been doing this since the early 80's and I'm still alive and kickin. I told her that when I first met this new gastro back in October I told him that I didn't expect him to cure me- just keep me comfortable when I have the rare flare-up.

I guess he didn't listen to that last part.

I guess it's nice that he cares enough to want to fix me, but I have become a realist about this liver thing. It's not something that he or any other doctor can fix.

It is what it is.

(PS- I really like the way that last sentence rolls off the tongue, don't you?)

I just want documentation when I have flare-ups so if I need to go on disability at some point- the evidence is there. I honestly don't think it'll come to that point as long as I continue to keep a job that allows me to work from home a few days a week. That's been a wonderful thing for my health.

The nurse was insistent, so I guess I get to go in for another round of tests. Thankfully, I had a liver biopsy a year ago- so that one can be crossed off the list.

In case you're wondering- I believe that liver biopsies fall into the category of cruel and unusual punishment and so I'm glad that I only have to get them every five years. I've had five now, and all but one have taken place while I was fully conscious.

Percutaneous Liver Biopsy
In a percutaneous liver biopsy procedure, local anesthesia is used to numb the skin where a small incision is made. A needle the diameter of a pen refill is then passed through the skin and into the liver, where a specimen is obtained. Multiple biopsies may be taken. In these circumstances, the physician establishes where the liver lies by percussing or tapping on the skin overlying the liver and listening to the sound to find an area of dullness, under which the liver lies. Patient cooperation is critical during the procedure.

For the record? The local anesthesia? Not so much.

Oh well, I guess having an over-exuberant doctor is better than having one that ignores me, especially since I'm the one that is first in line when it comes to ignoring me.

I'll let you know if he comes up with some cure-all that 20 some years of doctors haven't found yet.

PS- dear insurance company- thank you for all the money you’ve spent on my noggin and liver. Love and kisses, RG